Little Rituals
It is another new year. This is the year when I will finally do it—get my house in order, clean out the storage room(s), get the perfect tracking system for my business, and . . .
Begin the writing again.
It is not always on the first of the new year that I do this. Sometimes it is the beginning of a new season. Or my birthday or the beginning of a new class—how many writing classes have I taken? But here I am again. And this time I built a ritual around it. Candles, sushi, a great bubbly. Quiet time without interruption. Ah yes this will be the time.
These rituals are important. They set the mood and help you set your intentions. So the candles are lit. John Coltrane is adding rhythm. I have read previous posts to remind me what this writing is all about. All a good start. And that is just it. A good start. However what good is a good start if you don’t follow through? I cannot promise that I will follow through and create a regular practice of writing these posts but today on this cold, dark January 1st that is my intention. Do you find yourself starting over and over again? Let’s explore some options that might help.
Why are you doing this?
Ah, that is a good question, I have always told myself that I don’t care in anyone reads this. I am doing it for myself. Ah, but that is not the truth. I do care. I am writing it for you. You who have come upon this and are actually reading it. I want it to be inspirational, entertaining and leave you wanting more. A post like this does not give immediate feedback and that makes it a challenge. So for now I will go back to the fiction that I do’t care if anyone is reading it. I will continue with the candles, reading previous posts and looking for inspiration.
Do you have your tools at hand?
I know, I know. I have had plenty of lectures that it does not matter if you are writing on the back of an envelope. The important thing is to just write. However it sure does help to have your tools ready. A table and chair. Good lighting. Is your device charged? Some people have a specific pen and notebook. My handwriting was never all that good but lt has deteriorated so that even I cannot read it. Therefore handwriting in a notebook is or that first thing in the morning journaling. The kind of thing you will never have to look at again. Writing you want to share does require being able to read it the next day. So for me it is my trusty iPad. I like that because it is more mobile than carrying a computer around with with me. Your results may vary.
Have a search engine available
As I age, and even before that, I often suffer from brain fog. What was that word, that location, that name? It is amazing how much Dr. Google can help. Sometimes I can look for a word that means the same thing. Or describe the person to find the name. You may need to search your contacts or your friends list. What was that song? What can you remember? The first line? The artist? Can you describe the subject? This is not a matter of aging brain. It has always been the case that my brain goes blank. Sometimes it helps to just remember how long the word is and leave space to come back.
Have a cheering team
It seems that many writers like being alone. No need to share. I am not one of those. I need to share with my friends. I need the cheer team. Now the cheer team needs to be people who understand the craft of writing. My cheer team is most often members of my writing classes or groups. As these groups fade, I must find new ones. Writers gather. Especially for those of us who are social.
Set a regular time every day
OK, this one I have not mastered. It is my intention. An intention I keep repeating. This time I will actually do it. Julia Cameron of The Artists Way suggests morning pages. Morning pages are not writing. Morning pages are for only you. They clear your brain and help you get focus. They are important like brushing your teeth. But they are not actual writing—the stuff you want others to read.
Read what others are writing
This serves several purposes. It exposes you to different writing styles, gives you knowledge you can use for your own writing and sometimes just helps the brain to function. If find that it also helps me observe the zeitgeist-what are people reading? What are they talking about?
Now as you may have guessed by now, these suggestions are not for you, the reader. They are for me, the writer, or rather, the would be writer.
Happy new year. Hope to “see” you again soon.
Here We Go, Another Post About Beginning Again
From the Not Your Grandmother’s 70 March 2022
I felt this post was very timely, so sharing it again.
How many times have you decided to begin again? Begin a new career? Begin a more healthy life? Begin your best-selling book? Begin a new hobby? There are so many things we might want to begin again. Well, to quote Nike—JUST DO IT. Easier said than done. Right? I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t always work.
So many times in my life, I wanted to begin again. Maybe more than most people. In my adult life, I have lived in 20 homes! I just counted, and that’s what it is. I started the count when I was 20, and a new bride and number 20 brings me to my lake view. Careers? I’m not sure how to count. Let’s just say a lot. However, I have been in my current career twenty-five years. Two states but the same career.
The pandemic has caused many people to reassess their lives. What is really important? What do I do now? I didn’t get into the bread-making mode. I did learn to love Zoom. (no shoes, sweatpants, and sports bra) I thought about all the ways I would begin again. I thought I would begin again in both Januarys of the pandemic. Birthday? First of the month? Monday?
Distraction. What gets in the way? I will start as soon as I unload/load the dishwasher. I will start when I get the living room re-arranged. Oh, I need to respond to emails. Twitter, Instagram, Facebook. Wait a minute. Where did the morning go?
Today I picked up Julia Cameron’s Book- The Artists Way and the follow-up—are you ready for this? It’s Never Too Late to Begin Again. The message I have been preaching! It is a twelve-week program. Twelve weeks! I looked through both books and the companion workbook. I never made it past week three. So do I begin at week four, or do I start at week one? I think the message is START NOW.
The Time Machine Question
(From the Archives of Not Your Grandmother’s 70, October 2018)
What would you tell your younger self? Ah, the time machine question.
I was recently challenged to write about what I would tell my younger self. Obviously: “Keep writing!”
I wrote as a young girl. When did that stop? Probably when my mother read my biographical journal and made fun of it. So younger self:
DO NOT STOP WRITING BECAUSE SOMEONE DID NOT APPRECIATE WHAT YOU WROTE
I was so excited to take journalism in high school. I learned to write – who, what, and why for the first paragraph. I learned a little about typesetting. (How quaint.) However, I did not stay with it. Why? The teacher did not like some of my mannerisms and suggested journalism was not for me. So younger self:
DON’T LET SOMEONE ELSE’S OPINION STOP YOU FROM DOING WHAT YOU WANT TO DO
Marriage, teaching, motherhood, divorce, mid-life. When did I stop writing? Why? Then, at last — law school. Law school is all about writing. Complex, challenging, REAL writing. I even wrote a law review article. Great practice, even if it was not published. Actually, it was quite prescient, and I took a stand. As I recall, it was something about defining a “close relationship” and could include an unmarried partner. Not bad for 1995, is it? So, younger self:
TAKE A STAND AND WRITE ABOUT IT
I passed the bar and opened a law practice. Passed another bar and opened another law practice in a different state. Even though bar exams involved a lot of writing, it is not the creative writing I craved. That budding writer was still dormant.
One day as I was building my new business, I received a sales call from a local newspaper. They offered me the opportunity to write a column – an advertorial I learned. You know — the one you would get at the bank or the car wash? I jumped at the chance. That column jump-started my writing. I wrote a monthly column. People came into my office with the column in hand. I got a lot of business. And I was getting great feedback about my writing.
After a few years, that newspaper folded —literally. By then, everyone had websites, and my columns easily transferred to a blog on my website. That led to joining a reticent bloggers group which was the start of many writing classes, retreats, and ongoing groups. I then officially considered myself a writer. I even published a book. Younger self: Why did you have to be 60 before you started writing?
YOU ARE NEVER TOO OLD TO BEGIN AGAIN, AND YOU CAN REINVENT YOURSELF AT ANY AGE
Now it is your turn:
WHAT WOULD YOU TELL YOUR YOUNGER SELF?
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Day 1
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I said I was going to blog. I actually published some posts and some got reposted. Good grief I even have some followers. Now what? I participated in a thirty day challenge to blog every day. I lasted four days. Now what? I made a commitment that I would continue...
SOME DAYS ARE LIKE THAT — EVEN IN AUSTRALIA
One of my favorite children's books is Alexander and the Horrible Terrible Very Bad Day. Maybe you have read it? It begins with Alexander declaring "I woke up this morning with gum in my hair and I knew it was going to be a horrible terrible very bad day" He then...
What Happened to the Dinner Party?
I love to browse cookbooks and magazines about cooking. I subscribe to Cooks Illustrated and and even watch the Food Network at the gym. (OK, I did that three times but it sounds good) I imagine the wonderful dinner parties I will have. In the meantime I eat...
Things You Must Not Say If You Don’t Want to Look OLD
"Aging is mandatory. Getting old is optional" has become my mantra. Granted I am being opinionated here which is a prerogative of being a sage, which I intend to be. So here goes my own opinion grounded in careful research while moving around my community and...
Technology for Old People
I don't want to be disparaging to old people. I just don't want to be one of them. If you are reveling in being old, go for it. I choose not be. So here are some more irreverent ways not be old. TECHNOLOGY Please don't run from technology. You learned how to use...
Why do all the “How to Look Fabulous at Any Age” Articles End at 50?
Glamour, Vogue, W, Cosmopolitan, Savvy. We expected it of them. But MORE -- the magazine for mature women? They all do fashion and makeup articles for looking good at any age. Really? ANY age? Rarely do they even go to 60. As the baby boomers are now in their...
Say Good Bye to Sixty
Six months ago I started this blog with the idea of memorializing my countdown to the end of my sixties. I added one more post shortly after the first when I found my mentor and writing coach had pushed me out of the nest by publishing my post to her 800 nearest and...
OMG I’ve Been Outed
Feel the fear and do it anyway. So they say. What do they know anyway? It usually takes a good friend to push you into the water, or off the couch. I have just had a friend give me that push. I have been outed. For some time I have been tinkering around with...
Not Your Grandmother’s 70
"My financial plan only needs to go to seventy because that's all the longer I plan to live" A financial planner quoting a client I was quite taken by this comment from a financial planner sitting on a panel with me on retirement planning. It was a...
Thank You, Gloria Steinem
But you don't look ________(that old) Gloria Steinem is one of my heroines. She came into my life at just the right time. When she turned 40, it was unheard of for a woman of such years to admit her age. She did. People kept telling her that she didn't look forty....
Welcome to 2011 — The Year the First Baby Boomer Turns 65
Yesterday the first baby boomer turned 65. I'm ahead of the curve. I'm not exactly a member of "the greatest generation". (Never mind that I was born in the wrong county for that). I'm apparently five years older than the oldest boomer, yet that is where I feel I fit....
Karin Quirk